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Where are we now?4/16/2023 So where are things with Harmonia?
March 31, 2003, I left Ohio, separating any direct ties with my life there as I returned to Ontario, Canada. In summer of 2003, I think 2004, Thetis and her well off hubby number four, brought Harmonia up to Ontario to spend a week with me. Then Thetis claimed they “couldn’t afford” to bring her up and if I wanted to see her, I’d have to pay her travel expenses. I was making about $16,000 Canadian a year while Thetis and he made over $200,000 US a year, but hey, they couldn’t afford to bring her up to Canada, right? I was barely getting by financially, so it was the last time I saw Harmonia. I’m certain her mother lied to her then and every time after that I had made the decision not to see Harmonia because I didn’t want to not because I couldn’t afford to. In 2008 Thetis decided her husband’s prior six figure income (and her five-figure income) wasn’t enough, so she tried to sue me for child support. If I remember correctly, they wanted something around $450 US per month and I was making about $1,200 Cdn per month full time. I also had about $10,000 in credit card debt, using my card to pay for things like food and utilities. The lawyer contacted me, and we began negotiations, Thetis tried to claim she couldn’t work and tried to use a one-year-old medical report to support her claim. The court wouldn’t accept it but it had little impact on what they expected me to pay. Thetis’ lawyer suggested first, if I agreed to give up my parental rights and have no contact with Harmonia, they would have the court reduce my child support to $0 per month. So, my options were:
The only condition I had was that Thetis would name Entorpe as Harmonia’s legal guardian in the event of her death – no way in hell were her parents going to become Harmonia’s guardian if I had any say in it. Everyone agreed and I signed over my rights. I said “prior income” because, as it turns out, Thetis’ husband number four had died in 2005. I suspect that’s another reason Thetis came after me for support. His life insurance probably paid off for the house and everything else. In 2008, when she was suing me for support, she had a $20,000 family vacation booked in Florida and had just purchased new furniture for the house. In 2008 Thetis reluctantly spoke to me on the phone (that is when she wasn’t writing letters to my parents trying to claim I had been unfaithful at the end of our marriage and that’s why we got divorced, a story for another time) about the child support suit. She said, and I quote “if you had just let Tarro adopt Harmonia then she would have received survivor benefits as his child” when he died. Thetis never once in all the years after our marriage asked me about Tarro adopting Harmonia. Was I supposed to suggest it to her? It just screamed to me that Thetis was angry because she missed out on another payday to support whatever habit she spent her money on. It wasn’t about support for Harmonia, it was about more money for Thetis. So 2008 was the last contact I had with Harmonia (over the phone). My father heard from her around 2014, apparently “now that she was 18, she could call anyone she wanted to”. Yet another strange statement that even my father wondered about. What parent wouldn’t allow a child to call their grandparents? Well, the timing was such that my mother, her grandmother, had died the year before from cancer, so thanks to Thetis she never got the chance to say goodbye to her. Whether my father was aware or oblivious apparently Harmonia was pressuring him for money with the idea that she could come up to Canada for a visit. If she was anything like her mother, she’d get the money and that would be the long and short of it. My father didn’t have a reason to see her and since she made no attempt to contact me, she remained in Ohio. It’s not like she doesn’t know how to find me, clearly her mother and siblings have brainwashed her. She is 27 now and still lives in the Barnard house – probably trying to survive her mother (who is 70 now). I hope she’s in the will. I have a lot of other stories to write about in the future.
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